I reeeeeally know about, the people who look the most awesome when they go out are probably the ones who are secretly "._." inside. Of course, you don't spend all that time looking good if you don't care.
Blugh, doctors. <.<. Seen enough of their faces recently. I reeeally sympathise with this whole second paragraph, so much you don't even know. It's like... what's the cute value of a basket of kittens... multiply it by 10... I sympathise that much. Something like that <.< I get so freaked out by the thought of changing meal plan. I mean... I have a tube thing now and that's good/bad, good because I feel "safe" with it like someone else is taking control for me. And bad because AAAAH CANNOT JUST STOP and CRAZY AMOUNT OF CALORIES and I swear, I used to think all Japanese actors were so thin and compare myself to them but now I am like watching movies and going BUT I DON'T WANT TO WEIGHT THAT MUCH AAAAH *head explode*
But yeah. I do the same thing. I get to a really bad place and I'm all... panic... I'm going to make my body break down and ruin myself. My heart is bad, my energy is zero, you know? And yetttt it is so tempting, I flirt with it even when I am being good. I think about it. I identify as it even though I'm in recovery, can't be good right? :{
Anyway~ Good luck with the meal plan! Hope it can be something okay and safe feeling for you. Just remember, is more easy to be fabulous if you have some energy to stay on the dance floor ^^ ♥
aaaand I should do your meme but I'm going to go back and reply to what you said on mine first because it is distracting me or something? @v@
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branchandroot
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Date: 2011-06-27 02:17 am (UTC)Blugh, doctors. <.<. Seen enough of their faces recently. I reeeally sympathise with this whole second paragraph, so much you don't even know. It's like... what's the cute value of a basket of kittens... multiply it by 10... I sympathise that much. Something like that <.< I get so freaked out by the thought of changing meal plan. I mean... I have a tube thing now and that's good/bad, good because I feel "safe" with it like someone else is taking control for me. And bad because AAAAH CANNOT JUST STOP and CRAZY AMOUNT OF CALORIES and I swear, I used to think all Japanese actors were so thin and compare myself to them but now I am like watching movies and going BUT I DON'T WANT TO WEIGHT THAT MUCH AAAAH *head explode*
But yeah. I do the same thing. I get to a really bad place and I'm all... panic... I'm going to make my body break down and ruin myself. My heart is bad, my energy is zero, you know? And yetttt it is so tempting, I flirt with it even when I am being good. I think about it. I identify as it even though I'm in recovery, can't be good right? :{
Anyway~ Good luck with the meal plan! Hope it can be something okay and safe feeling for you. Just remember, is more easy to be fabulous if you have some energy to stay on the dance floor ^^ ♥
aaaand I should do your meme but I'm going to go back and reply to what you said on mine first because it is distracting me or something? @v@